- Wed, 12:18: Is there a color swatch I can use to tell if I'm too brown to vote in GOP run states? "Cinnamon? Oh no, no vote for you!"
- Wed, 12:45: RT @LOLGOP: Your gay marriage ban is like the Oscar for Crash. Maybe someone thought it was an good idea in 2006 but it's embarrassing to d…
- Wed, 15:05: RT @LOLGOP: Patriot - n. someone who wears a flag pin while moving a corporation overseas to avoid taxes
- Wed, 17:51: RT @jesussaveyuo: Chronic materbaters, place your hand upon the screen and be healed!
- Wed, 17:53: #farts
- Wed, 18:30: Step 4: Apply the newly moistened towelette to the affected area in a vigorous manner.
- Wed, 21:31: The zipper broke on my favorite hoodie. I finally understand why the Amish refer to it as Satan's Seam.
Thu, 10:51: RT @ itskristofer: what if god came down to earth and said “it’s pronounced jod” and left
Tue, 14:39: Some people should take drugs. Or take fewer drugs. https://t.co/BTTBfQGLw3 Wed, 11:26: This is an adult woman that…
Mon, 10:44: RT @ OhNoSheTwitnt: There have been plenty of all-male everythings throughout all of our lives and yet no one asks “are they…