- Sat, 09:39: Today's agenda: wake up, poop, maybe eat an early lunch. Maybe poop again later.
- Sat, 10:01: The British teenage girls behind me will hopefully get hit by a lorry. Such droll, dreadful beasts.
- Sat, 10:57: What am I doing with my life when we live in a world that allows Lifehouse to have a sixth album?
Fri, 16:29: RT @ allisonkilkenny: Today I learned of the term "geriatric millennial." I'm accepting flowers and cash donation condolences.…
Thu, 12:51: RT @ joshgondelman: A good thing to read! https://t.co/S8rOqudjz8 Thu, 12:52: RT @ JenKirkman: Got harassed for saying this…
Mon, 14:57: I'm starting to think that dogecoin is the Cutco Knives of currency. They should try throwing in a free sharpener if you buy 10 or…