- Tue, 17:00: Ugh, I hate when I use a dryer that doesn't work. Hate infinitely more when it happens twice. So much for my evening.
- Tue, 20:20: Hearing the theme to The X-Files loudly drifting into an otherwise silent street is goddamn creepy. Thanks Astoria.
- Wed, 00:45: Speed Racer spent his whole life wanting to be a pianist but who would take him seriously with that name?
- Wed, 10:07: When I express actual interest in a lady, I feel like this is how it comes across: http://t.co/2gafJvA2
- Wed, 10:08: RT @YourMomBot: @djmrcurmudgeon Your mom is how it comes across: http://t.co/OoXc7D0t
Fri, 16:29: RT @ allisonkilkenny: Today I learned of the term "geriatric millennial." I'm accepting flowers and cash donation condolences.…
Thu, 12:51: RT @ joshgondelman: A good thing to read! https://t.co/S8rOqudjz8 Thu, 12:52: RT @ JenKirkman: Got harassed for saying this…
Mon, 14:57: I'm starting to think that dogecoin is the Cutco Knives of currency. They should try throwing in a free sharpener if you buy 10 or…