My tweets

Wed, 14:26: @KatrinHier If only the internet had never been built, you might have been well-adjusted and misinformed about Earth!
Wed, 16:12: @TheKatBurdick While I haven't shed all of the weight I want to, the only chub that wobbles isn't the chub we're measuring.
Wed, 17:32: My new weightloss plan simply involves riding crowded train cars until I've sweated enough that I can empty out a car. #sogross #hatesummer
Wed, 19:17: Kansas REALLY likes making me hate them. If you support hate legislation, please punch yourself in the face repeatedly. http://t.co/mW1vV3vf
Thu, 07:33: The polar bears I am descended from were not designed for this summer weather bullshit.
Thu, 07:41: Not even sundresses can make this heat bearable. Almost. Almost.
Thu, 09:16: RT @BillCorbett: Let's have a hearty round of applause for @joegarden, who is retiring as features editor of The Onion after a long, bri ...
Thu, 10:37: Living alone means never using an ice cream scoop or a bowl unless you're trying to impress the neighborhood peeping tom.