in youth, we mourn for ourselves because we don't know any other way to express pain. we mourn our futures and our past and our pain and our loss, always in regards to ourselves. as we grow older, we harden, become aloof from ourselves, and begin to lament the mourning of self of our own children. we mourn for their lack of vision, their inability to look beyond, their self-hatred and self-pity. near death, we mourn our lives, our regrets, our missed opportunites and lost loves and the dead end jobs that we stayed in because we had to buy that car, tv, pool table, mail-order bride. in death, others mourn for our death, but their mourning is for their own selfish loss. in the grave, there is no mourning, only the life cycle at work.