November 16th, 2003

into this night i wander

this is my favorite rock, i come here to think about all the things that make me...

I'm a fool. For a lot of reasons. The last thing I want to do tonight is sleep in that lonely bed and dream of could've beens. It might have been stupid to start down this path months ago, but it hurts to have strayed from it. I wish there was something I could do to take back what's been done. Unfortunately, though another wish of mine made in the last year may have come true, I don't think this is one that has a chance.
  • Current Music
    Sting and Alanis Morissette - King of Pain (Acoustic)
into this night i wander

i'm tired of feeling nothing, goodbye...

wait for everyone to go away and in a dimly lit room where you've got nothing to hide, say your goodbyes...

i'm falling. where and when i'll land is hard to guess. typically i'd pull my arms in and try to gain as much speed as possible so that the impact will be swift. so why am i flailing about trying to find something to slow my descent? what's different this time? once upon a time, i believed the best method of getting past any and all pain was to wrap your arms around yourself during descent so that you'd burn up on re-entry. why is it that i can't seem to do that this time?

i own some good mood music though.

and i can't escape the idea that this is what life will be like forever and ever amen.

are you happy
wandering
  • Current Music
    Counting Crows - Raining In Baltimore (live)