My tweets

Wed, 12:50: How many bottles of wine and varieties of cheese do you put in your Ebola emergency quarantine kit?
Wed, 15:37: RT @LOLGOP: Shep Smith: No Ebola outbreak in U.S.; get a flu shot THE REST OF FOX NEWS: HOW VOTING REPUBLICAN CURES THE EBOLA YOUR CLEARLY…
Wed, 17:31: RT @TeaPartyCat: WHY IS OBAMA HOLDING CABINET MEETINGS ABOUT EBOLA??? HE SHOULD BE DOING SOMETHING!!! LIKE INVADING IRAQ! SOMETHING!!!!
Wed, 17:32: RT @WhiteHouse: #Ebola is NOT spread through: 1. Casual contact 2. Air 3. Water 4. Food in the U.S. http://t.co/kICO4R7GpX http://t.co/3Qkx…
Wed, 18:16: The Royals are going to the World Series? Am I in an alternate universe? I hope George Brett tells a poop story in celebration.
Wed, 18:44: RT @prettyboymusic: Wow! San Francisco fans showing solidarity with #Stl #Ferguson! #mikebrown #shawshooting #FergusonOctober http://t.co/…
Wed, 18:46: If you are an average American citizen and are afraid that you'll get Ebola, I have bad news: you are an idiot.
Wed, 19:09: RT @joshgondelman: When you date someone with diabetes, buying her chocolates is less thoughtful than just doing nothing.
Thu, 09:37: RT @KatraHigher: i KNOW WHEN I GET DRUNK I CONSTANTLY VIEW CHILD PORN (?????????????????????????) WHAT EVEN THE FUCK JOHN GRISHMAN